“He/she is so selfish!”
We have often heard this remark being made on others, or have ourselves remarked about someone.
And somewhere down the line, we started associating the word “selfish” with it being a “bad trait.”
Very recently, when I introspected about this, I realised how we have generalised this word and made it seem like it is something to be looked down upon.
Is being selfish really “bad?” Or have we misunderstood this completely?
To perceive selfishness as bad, we need to see the circumstances and the context of the situation.
The word “selfish” means “lacking consideration for others; concerned chiefly with one’s interest.”
While in most cases this may be true, it need not be in some situations, isn’t it?
For example, a person disregards somebody’s efforts and takes all the credit on themselves, least bothering to appreciate the other person’s work. That is unhealthy selfishness.
In another case, let us say you are feeling under the weather and want to do nothing but sleep and rest. Your employer keeps calling you over and over again and asks you to work despite knowing that you are unwell. You turn off your phone or simply stop responding to work calls and messages and take time off to rest and recover. That is healthy selfishness.
We haven’t been taught to distinguish between healthy and unhealthy selfishness. And more often than not, we feel guilty when we try to enforce healthy selfishness.
Selflessness and putting everybody’s needs ahead of one’s own is celebrated and praised to the skies, but when even for an instance someone tries to prioritise their well-being, they are looked down upon and called “selfish.”
It is essential to understand that at times, putting self-interest on the top is natural and in fact, extremely important for personal well-being.
Ultimately, one has to strike a healthy balance between both and prioritize personal well-being as well as the well-being of others.
What are your views on this? Let me know in the comments!
Until next time, stay blessed.
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As long as you don’t harm/hurt others intentionally or don’t comment on how others are selfish for whatever reason we should be good.
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We just talked about how thinking about ourself before others without harming anyone still makes us feel guilty in a way – but it shouldn’t. It should feel normal.
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Absolutely
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